The stage is bare except for a big, empty frame that sits wherever the production wants, so long as it is constantly visible to both actors and audience.
CAMILA walks on stage, clears her throat, smooths her skirt. She waits a few beats before taking a breath and putting on a performative smile.
CAMILA
Good evening!
Beat.
CAMILA resists the urge to crawl her way backstage and decompose.
CAMILA
We are so glad to have each and every one of you here today. Front row and back, friends of the cast and friends of the “thee-ay-ter”. Regardless of whether or not you silenced your phone.
(lowers voice)…That’s not true, turn it off or get out.
So don’t blink! In a few moments, ladies and gentle… (CAMILA spots JUAN PABLO sitting the crowd and drops the act)JUANPA! NO ME JODAS! I am NOT doing this alone!
Lights on JUAN PABLO, who is hiding in the audience.
JUAN PABLO
Ya te dije que no iba a hacer esta / vaina…
CAMILA
/Me estas haciendo pasar pena!
JUAN PABLO
Tu eres la que queria tomar teatro, yo simplemente te estaba / complaciendo…
CAMILA
/Te juro por los clavos de Jesucristo que si no bajas en este instante…
JUAN PABLO
You’re doing great.
CAMILA takes off one of her heels and takes aim. JUAN PABLO ducks
JUAN PABLO
Okay, okay!
Being as disruptive as possible, JUAN PABLO makes his way out of the audience and ambles on stage. CAMILA grabs his shoulders and places him where he was supposed to be standing.
JUAN PABLO
(patiently) Do you want to start over?
CAMILA
No, no, solo sigue despues de “Ladies and Gentlemen”! (she poses with her performative smile)
JUAN PABLO takes a deep breath, puts on a winning smile and…
Blackout.
JUAN PABLO snickers.
CAMILA
We took too long. The play is starting. (Music begins to play) DAMN IT JUANPA!
JUAN PABLO laughs in the darkness, and we can hear CAMILA smacking him as they hurry off stage.
Beat.
Another Beat.
Maybe crying? Maybe as if here are several people among us trying their best to hide the fact that they’re crying.
SHOTA & NALA & OLIVER & MANON
This too shall pass.
Sabrina Parra Díaz 